The State of Mental Health

[Wickabee]

Thanks veg. A few questions if you don't mind.
How long did you date?
When you began dating did you know she had issues?
She you say she "flipped", how so? Starting arguments? Did she ever become violent? Just mood swings?

[mrveggieman]

Thanks veg. A few questions if you don't mind.
How long did you date?
When you began dating did you know she had issues?
She you say she "flipped", how so? Starting arguments? Did she ever become violent? Just mood swings?

It was a couple of months during the summer of 2000. I actually knew her before but didn't call her until one day I was going through some papers I had ran across her number and decided to give her a call. At first I thought that I wasn't going to anywhere with her because she was probably taken. She was an attractive 23 yr old girl (back then) with no kids, a car and a job. You figure every man would be beating down her door. I had someone tell me once if a girl has all that going on for herself be careful because there is probably something wrong with her. Anyway I was over a buddy's house playing video games and she paged me. I called her back. She wanted me to come see her. The only problem was she lived about an hour drive away and none of them wanted to take me out there and she really didn't know her way around my side of town. I asked one of them to take me and I can't repeat on here what they said she would have to do in order for them to take me out there. When she heard that she started screaming and acting stupid like she was on drugs. That should have been the first red flag but I ignored it. I finally did make it out to see her. Like I said she was very actractive. We talked and we ended up going to Ocean City for the weekend. The first weekend with her was ok but as things went on that is when she would start flipping out. She wanted to control what I watch on tv, what type of music I listen to and even who I vote for. She never got violent with as far as putting her hands on me but knowing her if I would have stayed with her long enough she would have tried to kill me in my sleep. I ended up having to let her go. Afterwards she kept playing on my phone and leaving me stupid emails. I had to have a female friend of mines leave her a threating message on her voice mail in order for her to stop.

[Wickabee]

Knowing what you know now, as opposed to then, about mental health would you have handled it differently?

I fully admit sometimes you have to cut ties.

[mrveggieman]

Knowing what you know now, as opposed to then, about mental health would you have handled it differently?

I fully admit sometimes you have to cut ties.

I have less patience for nonsense from a female now than back then so I would have gotton rid of her much sooner. I would have felt bad that she was suffering from mental illness but there was nothing that I could have did for her then or now except pray for her.

[Wickabee]

I have less patience for nonsense from a female now than back then so I would have gotton rid of her much sooner. I would have felt bad that she was suffering from mental illness but there was nothing that I could have did for her then or now except pray for her.

That's very fair.
People with mental illness are looking to anyone for help. What is often forgotten is that very few are actually qualified to deal with mental illness. So you have someone with a mental illness expecting help from someone who has no idea what's happening.

Did you recognize at the time she had problems beyond "chicks be crazy"?

[mrveggieman]

That's very fair.
People with mental illness are looking to anyone for help. What is often forgotten is that very few are actually qualified to deal with mental illness. So you have someone with a mental illness expecting help from someone who has no idea what's happening.

Did you recognize at the time she had problems beyond "chicks be crazy"?

She said admitted that she had mental illness but back then I thought that she was just blowing things out of porportion and should just suck it up and deal with it. I know now that she was in far worse shape than I could have appreciated than I did when I was 25 any my only worry was getting my next piece of tail.

[Wickabee]

That's an interesting point, which goes back to my first post. How many people hear "I'm battling depression" or "I have a mental illness" and take "I want attention" from that?

No judgement as I'm looking for honest answers.

[Monsterx]

Veg - She sounds like she had more than just depression.

[Monsterx]

That's very fair.
People with mental illness are looking to anyone for help. What is often forgotten is that very few are actually qualified to deal with mental illness. So you have someone with a mental illness expecting help from someone who has no idea what's happening.

Did you recognize at the time she had problems beyond "chicks be crazy"?

The bold part is SOO true! I got lucky...my gf at the time/wife now is a Social Therapist. She knew I could use some help lol. And it's great having someone who knows exactly how you're feeling without having to verbally express it when a lot of the time you can't!